My breath goes slower and deeper. My posture has changed. I stretch out my chin as if I wanted to pick up a scent. My muscles feel supple, I feel the inherent strength. I am relaxed and focused at the same time.
My gaze loses its sharpness, but I perceive my outer field of vision, the fine hairs on my cheeks stand up, feeling every breeze.
My mouth is watering… I see blood. This special way of changing my perception of blood can be described in a similar way. These “shifts” are well known in the scene, but do not resonate with every echo. Not everyone feels so instinctively addressed by a “meal”. There is even a whole group that follows this rather animalistic approach of Realyvampyrism.
One of many theories on this is found in the innate hunting instinct of humans. Even if this instinct is no longer known or experienced as such, the evolutionary component cannot be overestimated. Aggression and the willingness to use violence were once extremely useful behaviors for hunting, but they could also be acted out in it. Today… – well, those with a surplus of martial arts or mutate to hooligans on weekends. It is only right to call a human being rational, if one considers that he can only be placed on a scale between instinctive acting (unconsciously) and rational. Special attention is also paid here to the veto right of the own consciousness. However, before a decision to act (which, according to the latest findings of brain research, was taken unconsciously and then transferred to consciousness), a last part of the brain has the right to veto. Who hasn’t yet caught himself reaching for the last bar of chocolate and then stopping his hand before reaching the delicacy in motion?
Dealing with a shift – morality as a protective shield
Such shifts are not always triggered and not always allowed. What do I mean by this? The sight of blood can, but need not, cause such a reaction on the part of the vampire. If the vampire is saturated or simply relaxed, he may or may not trigger the shift on a purely voluntary basis. Usually this is perceived as pleasant, it is an experience.
But some people can also be taken by surprise and avoid triggers altogether. For clarification: A shift is simply a shift in perception. There is no talk of an active action to end this state – it may or may not follow afterwards.
But if these shifts are triggered, they can be overwhelming. Then it is a matter of keeping calm or at least regaining calm.
Under certain conditions, a safe acting out is possible – an initiated donor, safety precautions, a safe space… which is necessary.
The goal must never be to act out the hunting instinct in an actual hunt, i.e. to grab and/or injure another person. There are rules, a morality and this can surely not be simply “overridden”, even if this state can be partly exhausting. And this is where our own morals use their veto right, even if it means energetic effort at this moment – the state is tempting, but acting out the same would possibly have unwanted consequences. The tension between these two poles is endured or pacified.
Self control and limits
It is a dark part of oneself, a shadow side that is tempting, but should only lead to satisfaction when controlled.
No vamp wants to have to deal with his conscience afterwards, because he might have burdened a loved one beyond his limits. And certainly not one would like to make oneself legally attackable, because one has harmed someone in a way not agreed upon (Legally, as a sanguine practitioner one always moves in a grey area!)
But if you get the chance to live out your life in a controlled way, this control can become a strengthening element, in the sense of an ability that builds you up and enriches your own feeling with a mesmerizing component.
Those who are able to act out their behavior within the framework of their own morality and in consultation with other participants will also recognize their own limits. This realization offers the possibility to perceive oneself more consciously. Boundaries do not have to have a restrictive effect, but can also help you to recognize your place in the world. They can integrate you and give you security.
The shift as a link between the unconscious and the conscious
A shift gives you a wonderful opportunity to loosen up the always active, consciously acting and reason-led behavior. You can trace the sensation, give it space, discard shame, go on a dream journey, explore your own fantasies. There is still time for a revision afterwards.
(I’m not talking about letting go and crossing boundaries!) Meditation exercises in this state can certainly lead to a more holistic picture of the self. A shift may be able to show you your own darker sides, to look at them, to make friends with them and finally to integrate them.
Those who deal with shamansimus in a special way or call themselves Otherkin o.A. can meet their own animal being or their companion here.
This article is only a first insight into the complex of topics “animal in the vampyre”. The topic is still being explored by me and I am happy about new insights every day. This blog should help you to recognize yourself, to know that you are not alone with your feelings. If you feel the need to add your own little blog post here, please contact me 😉